Lost, Not Wandering
I have a terrible sense of direction. Almost assuredly if you ask me which direction I think we should go, you would be 93% correct in going in the opposite direction.
Dislocation Anxiety Disorder
Well, if everyone else on the planet can have a condition or disease, I can have one too, and mine is DAD.
A number of symptoms affect me dreadfully with this disease:
1. If my directions say “go approximately 1 mile and make a left on Main St.”, and Main St doesn’t appear after .72 miles, I turn around thinking I must have made a mistake. My breathing gets shallow and I begin to sweat.
2. If any of my directions seems to have an inconsistency, I start to make up my own. My breathing gets shallow and I begin to sweat.
3. I incessantly check my gas gauge to make sure I have at least enough gas to follow the Eastern sun back to the New Jersey shore, as I can usually find my way back home to Pennsylvania from there. My breathing gets shallow and I begin to sweat.
4. Even though I’m a male of the species, my natural instincts are overridden by this disease/disorder, and I stop and ask for directions.
5. I have Bonfire Of The Vanities flashbacks. My breathing gets shallow and I begin to sweat.
6. I have significant resentments for those folks who can recite their exact latitude and longitude at any moment and can find there way to any other location with ease and delight.
7. I have DAD-rage for those folks that don’t mind getting lost because “it’s an adventure.”
Excuse me, I have to go put my head in a paper bag and breath deeply. This has been quite traumatic for me.
Here’s the progress I’ve made so far on the second sleeve of the Alpaca Herd Jacket.
I’m hoping that I get most of the sweater done this weekend, but I’m still not sure what I’m going to do about the collar and button band.
Xmas Gifts from Kiwi-Land
Yes, James has been up to his holiday tricks, sending out New Zealand gifts to brighten my holiday.
As with his other xmas gifts, I will wait until the actual holiday to open it, although I always read the card immediately. As you might imagine from his blog, he writes a very thoughtful and lovely holiday greeting.