Adaptive or Co-Dependent - 12-10-21 01

Adaptive or Co-Dependent?

For any of you have grown up around alcoholism and/or addiction, it’s pretty common to either be adaptive/co-dependent or an addict/alcoholic yourself.

So Which Am I? Adaptive or Co-Dependent?

Unfortunately, I’m probably both.

I adapt very well to changing situations. Even with big changes. Retirement, for example, came very easily for me. Or even small changes, like moving the place where we store our drinking glasses. I don’t get crazed by change very much.

Sometimes adapting is about making a rational decision about circumstances and using my well-honed skills to make the best of whatever situation I’m given. Often this comes after looking at alternatives and possibilities for changing the circumstances to see if that’s a better way to go.

Other times, adapting is about trying to avoid conflict. Which isn’t the healthiest reason, I’m aware. Especially since many times when I do this, I’m guessing at what others are expecting when I really don’t know. And many times I’m wrong anyway.  This rationale for change also usually comes with some level of anxiety. And I rarely look at ways of changing the situation requiring me to adapt when fear of conflict is my motivation.

There has been some growth for me in this area. I’m starting to take those times where I fear conflict and deal with them in the same way I do when I’m making a more rational decision. I’m not always successful, but like many of my knitting projects, I am a work in progress.

Current Knitting

I finished working on both my two active projects from the last blog entry.

The moth hole fixes to the black and blue wrap are complete and now I just need to get it to the owner.

Black and Blue Stole 03-13-19-04

I was glad she came back to me to repair it. Having a lot of history on how this was made, I was able to do a better job than others might have been able to do.

I also finished what turned out to be a very long garter striped scarf.

Horizontal Garter Striped Scarf Brights 12-10-21 03

It’s 6″ wide and 95″ long.

Horizontal Garter Striped Scarf Brights 12-10-21 02

I love this scarf “design”. Even with vibrant colors, it looks conservative enough for many guys to wear. Plus it’s incredibly easy to knit, but looks quite elegant.

Perfect craft show item. This will go into inventory immediately.

2 comments on “Adaptive or Co-Dependent?

  1. I remember feeling very wise when I realized that my biggest strengths are also my biggest weakness meeting around back. I like the point about trying to discern when it is coming out from a place of strength and intention vs just coming out Willy Nilly. I had never heard of the thing about being overly adaptive but it makes sense that any kind of childhood instability could move one in that direction. Thanks for sharing.

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