Cutting Off My Nose
Have you ever stopped buying a product because the person selling it was a fucking asshole? I think I may be cutting off my nose to spite my face here.
When Cutting Off My Nose Is Acceptable
Let me first start off by stating how I feel about resentments. My thoughts are summed up by someone else’s ideas about it…usually:
“Resentments are like taking poison and hoping someone else dies.”
Poison…nosectomy…both seem more extreme than my current example.
Years ago, I found this fantastic baby alpaca yarn at a wool festival. Fingering weight and about 600 yards, it came in great colors and looked really great when I knit it up.
I got to be chatty with the vendor. She seemed a little bit odd, but she was in one of my Facebook forums, so I was friendly.
Then she turned ugly. She kept doubling down on an ignorant and hateful post she made. She started to sound like an abusive alcoholic. Out of touch with reality and insistent she was right to have such hateful ideas. I had promoted her yarns in the past, but that wasn’t going to happen again. And I vowed to never purchase from her again. I’ve seen her since at a wool festival and passed by the booth without interaction.
I’m just now using up the last of the yarn I purchased from her over the years. And it’s been about 3 or 4 years since I bought anything from her.
Yes, I will miss this yarn. And as of yet, I haven’t found anything quite as good.
But it’s still better than supporting this bigot’s business as far as I’m concerned. And honestly, it’s no where near as bad as losing a nose.
What’s it worth for you to lose a nose?
Current Knitting
More work on the Chevron Striped Wrap.
Finn doesn’t care, but I’m a little less than 1/4th finished with this project.
I’ve always loved the graphic beauty of this design. Especially when I have yarns in colors that show it off well. The original pattern is done in worsted weight yarn and doesn’t have an i-cord selvedge edge. I love the fingering-weight version of the design, but I’m not sure the i-cord edging is worth the extra effort.
I’m hopeful the edge gives the garment a bit more structure.
As much as I adore yarn,( and trust me I do ADORE it) even it is not worth supporting a bigot in any way.
Is a small thing to give up for the right thing.
Stick to your guns we come a long way. People like that do not need our business.
No yarn is worth supporting a hateful bigot.
Not supporting the business does not equal a Rhinotomy (the surgical removal of a nose).
On the other hand, you find out that the vendor (who you described as “odd”) may actually be mentally ill in some way- then I would advocate for some sort of Rhinoplasty- something that changes the shape of the nose- if you’re willing to enter into a dialogue with the individual.
If not- there are plenty of lovely vendors to explore. Perhaps you’ll find an even better product without the proboscis problems.
Nothing I don’t love about this comment.
I don’t equate taking a principled stand with “resentment” (either taking poison or cutting off one’s nose). But even if you do, good for you for voting with your dollars.
Its not like there aren’t a ton of fabulous yarns out there for you to explore, so the loss is the vendor’s. Knit on!
I totally try to not support businesses that outright go against my personal beliefs. I don’t generally shop at big box stores (except when they are the only place I can get vaccinated in my town. Lol). It’s all the same. It’s not resentment. It’s using your hard earned money to support what you want to. There’s lots of nice alpaca out there.
“Vote with your feet.” my mother would have said. (This includes your pocketbook.) Yes, you may miss the yarn, but I think you did the right thing.
What we spend our money on matters, imo. It’s one of the few ways we get to choose what to support. Sometimes I buy things for a higher price just so I can support what I want to see more of.
And, you’re right to make it clear that spreading bigoted ideas has consequences.
I hope you find a suitable replacement yarn.
As others have said, I’m a big believer of voting with my wallet. I don’t consider it resentment or rhinectomy. Sure she has nice yarns, so do a lot of other vendors. Some even nicer, I’m sure. However, we all need to draw our own line in the sand, and small businesses, especially will feel your loss more than you will feel hers.
OTOH, I go out of my way to support vendors I love; who fit into my utopian version of the world, where people care about others, do not engage in shaming behavior, and do not support bigotry in any form.
It’s another version of ‘be the change you want to happen.’
Applause!!!
Beautifully well stated…thank you.